Friday, 18 September 2009

Now, a less aggressive manner

When Mr. Vijay Badami and his family returned to Karnataka in India a couple of years ago, relatives told him that Singapore had changed them.

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Guanyu said...

Now, a less aggressive manner

By Cai Haoxiang
16 September 2009

When Mr. Vijay Badami and his family returned to Karnataka in India a couple of years ago, relatives told him that Singapore had changed them.

‘They told us, you are too gentle, soft, nice, humble, and quiet, you cannot survive in India,’ said the 51-year-old, who moved to Singapore in 1996 with his wife and two children.

Mr. Vijay, who became a citizen in 2004, was cited by Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong last night as an example of a new citizen who had integrated into Singapore society.

Mr. Lee told Nanyang Technological University students at a forum: ‘New arrivals often come with different social habits, which grate on locals. Singaporeans must understand they come from societies very different from ours.

‘In China and India, one has to be assertive and even aggressive to get anywhere. In Singapore, our social norms have become more restrained and considerate.’

Agreeing, Mr. Vijay told The Straits Times: ‘It’s a tough world in India. It’s survival of the fittest. There are millions of people with state degrees or high technical skills. Everyone is struggling to get noticed.’

He confessed that when he first arrived, his aggressive manner made colleagues uncomfortable. ‘They wouldn’t come back to me or engage me in a discussion because I tended to dominate.’

He realised that if he spoke loudly, he would be perceived as being rude or impolite. So he decided to ‘tone down’.

‘Now I feel communication can be achieved in a different way, a softer way, more nicely,’ said the business development manager at chemical manufacturer CLP International.

A long-time colleague, Mr. Yap Bok Joo, 51, recalled Mr. Vijay’s early days, when he was the only Indian in a company where most employees were Chinese.

‘He was new to this country. He used to stand in front of his colleagues while waiting for them to get things done,’ he recalled with a laugh.

‘Now, Vijay uses the soft approach. He is very encouraging, tries to understand his staff, and makes himself more approachable. He is an excellent department head.’

Mr. Yap added: ‘I think he adjusted more to us than we to him.’

Mr. Vijay said he moved here for the opportunities, liked the multiracial society and appreciated the presence of Hindu temples where he could worship.

He had not yet become a citizen when, in 1997, his son was selected for the Gifted Education Programme in primary school. Although the boy did not take up the offer, Mr. Vijay found it ‘incredible’.

‘I was extremely awestruck that the Government spent a lot of time developing younger people. If you do well, doors open for you,’ he said.